Taking care of older adults is a rewarding and important job, but it can also be challenging and surprising in ways you might not expect. Caregivers play a vital role in seniors’ lives, providing support, comfort, and help with daily activities. However, their experiences can sometimes be unpredictable and not always in a good way.

Here are a few real-life caregiving stories from across the internet that will leave you amazed—and a little shocked:

The Worst Kind of Eye Service

I started working at PFH (not the real name) a few months ago, and at first, the job was like heaven. When I joined, the hospital was trying to renew its license, so they made sure everything was done perfectly. We had everything we needed—disposable wipes, adult diapers, and all the supplies in every room. They even trained us properly on how to care for the elderly step by step.

We could spend like 30-45 minutes on each resident to make sure they were clean and comfortable. We bathed them, changed their clothes, applied body lotion, sometimes used special creams, shaved them, trimmed their nails, and brushed their teeth. If they used hearing aids or dentures, we’d fix those too. I liked the job because it wasn’t stressful, and since there was a no-lifting policy, it was perfect for me because I have a bad back.

But after they passed the audit, things changed fast. It was like they didn’t care anymore. No more disposable wipes or proper diapers. Sometimes, we didn’t even have flannels or towels to clean the residents. Caregivers had to figure things out on the spot—using tissue paper or paper towels, or whatever was nearby.

And then there’s the issue of staff.

When I first joined, if there were not enough workers, they would call a staffing agency to send extra hands. But after some time, one of the supervisors, let’s call her Amaka, decided that three caregivers should do the work of four people. In fact, sometimes they even made just two people handle what four caregivers were supposed to do. This became normal, and it caused us so much stress . Even the residents started noticing that the quality of care had gone down.

The hospital has about 15 permanent caregivers, but more than 60 who work part-time. This is another way they try to cut costs because part-time workers don’t get benefits like sick leave or paid holidays. They usually hire immigrants for these roles, and people quit often. Almost every week, I heard about someone who had left.

They hired me to work four shifts a week, each 7.5 hours long. But I often had to stay longer, sometimes up to 30 minutes, to finish my notes. They never paid for that extra time. Then, they started asking me to work extra shifts after my regular ones. Sometimes, I worked more hours than the permanent staff, and I didn’t even get any of the benefits.

Some workers were so tired they slept in their cars or in empty rooms so they could pick up the next shift. The company refused to call the agency for help anymore. Instead, they just piled all the work on us, no matter how short-staffed we were. It became clear they cared more about saving money than about us or the residents.

It’s frustrating because when I joined, I thought I’d found the perfect job. But now, it feels like they’re using and dumping people, and it’s just not fair.

“Is This Career For Me?”

One time, it was just two young care assistants (both in their first year as student nurses) managing an entire old people’s home during night duty. Normally, there should have been at least three care assistants and one senior nurse (let’s say an SNO), but the SNOs refused to show up for the shift. The one from the daytime was still around but had gone to sleep and said they should only wake her for emergencies.

So, these two student nurses were left to handle everything. One old man in one ward tried to get out of bed on his own, fell down, and started calling for help. At the same time, in the palliative care ward, another patient’s wound burst open and started bleeding heavily. One of the young nurses rushed to the bleeding patient, trying to stop the blood, but there was nobody to help her because it was only her and her colleague!

She quickly called for an ambulance, tied the wound with something to slow the bleeding, and ran to open the gate for the ambulance staff. She then called for another ambulance to help the man who fell down. (Thankfully, he survived.)

In the middle of all this, she called her manager to report the chaos, but the manager couldn’t get the SNO to wake up. Instead of helping or showing concern, the manager insulted the young nurse, saying she shouldn’t have called for outside help. After the shift, they fired her and even sent a letter to her nursing school to get her kicked out of the program. To make things worse, they told the families of the elderly patients that it was all her fault!

This girl was just 18 years old, and she was being blamed for everything. Luckily, her nursing school did their own investigation and found out the truth. They even blacklisted that old people’s home, so no more interns were sent there. She was allowed to continue her studies and is now interning at a proper hospital, but the experience shook her badly. Sometimes she still wonders if this career is even meant for her.

A Dangerous Gas Leak

One day, I had to go check on an old man for the first time. Normally, we arrange with the family or patient to agree on a time, but this time was different. I got a call from the office saying a caregiver was begging for help immediately. 

When I reached the house, a small, old bungalow in a quiet part of town, the caregiver was already waiting for me outside, looking very worried. He quickly told me what happened: earlier that morning, he entered the house and found the whole place filled with gas fumes. The old man had opened the valve on a propane gas tank on the veranda and left one of the stove burners on in the kitchen. That burner didn’t light on its own, so gas just kept leaking into the house. To make things worse, the man had also used his vacuum cleaner to suck up some poo he’d done on the floor. The smell of gas and that mess? I almost turned back immediately.

Clearly, the man was dealing with serious dementia, and the house was no longer safe for him. This wasn’t a situation where home care could work. I had to call people who could help arrange a better place for him to stay.

The old man was living there alone. The caregiver wasn’t even a proper caregiver—just a distant family friend who came to check on him because nobody else cared enough to. Honestly, that man probably saved his life by showing up that day.

When I finally met the old man, I explained to him gently that staying there wasn’t an option anymore. He could barely move around properly during the day, yet somehow, he managed to cause all this chaos in the middle of the night. It’s sad, but these things happen too often.

Scared for my life

I used to do small jobs like cleaning and caregiving before. One day, they sent me to this tall, old building where they keep elderly people that are hard to handle. My work that day was just small cleaning.

The client was this big, strong man, blind, who had mental health issues. . I introduced myself, and as soon as he heard my voice, he started looking for his cordless phone. The thing wasn’t charged, so I helped him put it back and told him it needed to charge.

Then he asked me, “Where is the other woman?” I told him she wasn’t available. Omo, that was when everything changed. This man started running towards me, swinging his arms anyhow like he wanted to fight somebody. He was even breathing heavily like someone chasing after a bus.

I didn’t even think twice. I grabbed my bag and ran straight for the door. As I passed the bathroom, I saw the towels and walls stained with poo. At that point, I knew this job wasn’t for me. 

The Phone Call You Never Want to Get

A few months ago, I had an experience that still shakes me whenever I think about it. We had a new patient who hadn’t answered her phone or door for about a week since the social worker last visited. That weekend, I was on call, so I decided to go and check on her.

I knocked on the door, not even expecting anyone to answer. I had already pulled out my “sorry I missed you” note to hang on the door. Then, a man opened the door. He said he was her ex-husband and that he was just about to call us because, according to him, “she had been asleep for over a day.”

As soon as I entered the house, it was obvious something was wrong. She was sitting on the couch, hunched over, her body gray and stiff. My heart sank. I panicked and told him to call 911. As an LPN (licensed nurse), I’m not allowed to declare someone dead, so I had to at least attempt CPR.

I asked him to help me get her to the ground, and after we managed to do that, he just walked away. The woman’s body was bent over into a C-shape, and I couldn’t even get her head to lie flat on the ground to open her airway. I didn’t want to let go and have her head hit the ground, so I just knelt there, holding her head and having my own panic attack until help finally arrived.

A “Ratty” Situation

The man was a serious hoarder, living in a house that looked like it should have been demolished years ago. He refused to see a general doctor (as if he didn’t need one), but luckily, his cardiologist agreed to help us manage his care plan.

When we got to his house, it was so cold, even though two small electric heaters were blasting directly on him. There was no place to sit down—not like I would have dared anyway, with all the junk everywhere. He refused to listen when we tried to talk to him about safety in the house.

Then, out of nowhere, I heard some noise in the pile of junk next to us. Before I could react, a rat jumped out! I just blurted, “Ah! That’s a rat!” And this man, with no shame at all, said, “Leave him alone. He’s allowed here. They come in through the roof.”

My curiosity got the best of me, so I went outside to check. True to his word, there was a big hole in the roof! It was so bad you could even see it from the street.

The Shack

I went to check on an elderly patient who lived in a makeshift shack by a swampy area. The man had a hole in his roof, no running water, and he was still using the toilet—let me not even talk about the smell. There was cat poop scattered everywhere, and the cat itself was wild, hissing and standing on his old, dirty mattress. I couldn’t even go near him.

I had to ask him to come outside so we could talk properly. We ended up completing the visit outside under the scorching sun. He was surviving on food from a kind neighbour, and sometimes, a small charity group would drop something off for him.

We tried calling some welfare organisations to help, but he refused to move anywhere else. Eventually, our agency stopped sending us there because the place was too dangerous for our health. It was really heartbreaking.

Understaffed & Overworked

I’m so tired of this job, honestly. It’s not that the work is hard, but there’s not enough people. I started at this care home just five weeks ago. In my first week alone, 6 caregivers quit in one day. That left only one person to handle the night shift. Now, my friend who I work closely with just told me she quit, so now we’re down to 3 caregivers for the day shift (which is the one I work). But it’s not really 3 because Tola doesn’t do anything. She just leaves residents in their briefs (not diapers, we call them briefs to be respectful) all day, doesn’t help them get up, and doesn’t do anything. It’s like she’s just there taking space. 

Most of the residents need help changing their briefs every few hours. Some need to be transferred, and some can’t feed themselves. There are also showers that need to be done, but there’s not enough time to do it all. Honestly, it’s scary. People don’t realise how hard caregiving is until they’ve been in it. It’s not that I don’t like the job—I actually enjoy it. But we’re so understaffed, and the pay is not worth the stress. 

People yell at you, bite you, and you’re trying to help them change out of their dirty briefs, all while hearing calls for help on the radio and cleaning up messes. You end up hurting your back, lifting people and walking around for hours. It’s exhausting. I’m drained and burnt out. 

Note: These stories have been edited to protect the identities of the individuals involved.

While these stories may sound hard to believe, unfortunately, they’re more common than we’d like to admit. Caregiving, like any profession, has its highs and lows, and it’s important to recognise both the rewarding and challenging aspects of the job.

Before starting a career as a caregiver, make sure you understand what’s involved. Speak up if something isn’t right, especially when it comes to the care and safety of your senior. After all, you are their first line of defence, and their well-being depends on you.

Families should also do their homework before choosing a care home for their loved ones. At @Ìtọ́jú, we take the worry out of the equation. With our highly trained and compassionate caregivers, excellent facilities, 24/7 electricity, and top-notch security, we ensure that your loved ones get the highest quality of care.

We also deeply value our caregivers. We provide them with the training, support, and tools they need to handle the physical and emotional challenges of caregiving. Our caregivers are well-paid and appreciated, and they take pride in their profession, knowing the incredible impact they have on the lives of others. When caregivers thrive, seniors thrive, too, and we are committed to creating an environment where everyone feels valued.

Please contact us for more information on elderly care and all that our care home offers.